Home Sweet Home...

I wrote this on the way back from my last trip home at the end of July. Enjoy.

I am sitting on a plane on my way to Georgia and I thought it would be a perfect time for a blog update…it has been awhile after all.

Well folks, life has been real. I had an amazing trip back home and it never gets easier to leave. I get a pit in my stomach and I have a tear in my eye every single time. Home is where my heart is. I’m family orientated and that’s the bottom line. I miss my parents, my brothers, my extended family and of course that little puppy dog of mine. I have friendships that have stood the test of time and people that would genuinely do anything for me. I get emotional even thinking about it.

I feel torn. I have a great life in Georgia. I have an amazing husband, a job that I love and a roof over my head. I just feel like it’s missing something. Joel and I want to start a family, but I want to pursue my career first. I want to put to use all of the education and knowledge that I have worked for over the years. I want to make a difference in the lives of my patients and those around me. I also want to be able to provide an amazing life for my children. I know that we will get there. I have no doubts. I also want my children to know what family is and to have our family watch them grow.

I just miss home….that’s all.

My sister in law’s baby shower went amazingly well and it was so great to see her so happy. My brother is glowing and she is the most radiant pregnant woman that I have ever seen. I am so happy that they are getting everything that they worked so hard for. They make me so proud each and every day.

In other news, something weird happened while I was at home. My father and I were watching the 11 o’clock Windsor news last night and there was a news story about a fire chief that had passed away. As I looked into the eyes of the strong man in the photo I realized that the man was someone that I had met during one of my dad’s chemo sessions. I looked at my dad and my eyes filled instantly with tears. My dad recognized him as well. Sadly, the news story was informing the public of the fire chief’s long battle with cancer and his unfortunate passing. My thoughts were focused on his children that he had talked about so proudly. I recalled how strong he looked in his chemo sessions and his laughter that eased the tension in the room. I face death on a daily basis, but it is a different thing when it hits so close to home. That could have very easily been my father and it is something that I do not take for granted. Life is so short and we never know what battles we will have to face. Hug your fathers and mothers and your loved ones and make sure they know how much you love them.

I think at the end of the day, when we wash our faces and take a good long look in the mirror, we need to be content in the path we have taken in life and feel like we are making some kind of difference in this world. I realize now, more than ever, that hospice is my calling. At this point in my life, I couldn’t imagine doing anything else.